Morphex's blogologue (Life, technology, music, politics, business, mental health and more)

This is the blog of Morten W. Petersen, aka. morphex in various places. I blog about my life, and what I find interesting and/or important. This is a personal blog without any editor or a lot of oversight so treat it as such. :)

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More on seeing the kids

So I went to trial last summer, to get to see more of the kids.

One of the things the kids mom has been on about, is that I've been mentally ill (which is true), but so much that I couldn't be alone with the kids, or rather that she had to be there whenever I was to be with the kids.

The kids mom been playing that card for a long time, and the last time I saw the kids, she had to meddle about something that I could have sorted out with my oldest son myself, so in my opinion she's using the kids to keep some contact with me, what the motivation for that contact is, I don't know, but obvious reasons could be to establish a relationship, even though I don't want to have anything to do with her, in any way.

And I've made that perfectly clear, many times.

Anyway, when I went to trial, I remember the kids moms lawyer saying something along the lines of documentation about my mental health from my therapist hadn't been submitted to the court.

In my email records I can see that a document regarding my mental health had been sent to the kids mom and her lawyer towards the end of 2013, and that document is here:

http://blogologue.com/skann-av-uttalelse-fra-helsevesenet.jp...

It says clearly that nothing in their treatment of me has given them reason to contact other authorities, regarding me and my kids. And therapists are bound by law to give notice if they discover something of concern.

I sent an email to the current lawyer of the kids mom, Anne Fladvad working at Advokathuset Helgeland, and will see what she has to say about this.


[Permalink] [By morphex] [Family (Atom feed)] [12 Feb 05:07 Europe/Oslo]

Talking about my music on the internet (freak.no forum)

So, I've been on different forums talking about my music, and I'm having some issues on the freak.no music forum.

Long story short, I think a lot of the feedback on the forum has been laced with unecessary negative remarks, and I've talked up against that.

So it seems that if other posters on the forum talk shit in threads I start, the threads get dropped. Which seems unfair.

There is also a very loose rule in the forum which says that the admins can do whatever they want, which is a bad rule as it gives too much power to the administrators and as such, is of course abused or misused.

Here's the discussion I had privately with one of the admins:

http://blogologue.com/dialog_med_administrator_freak.no.pdf

And yes he/she did OK that I posted this to my blog.

And the last thread I started which got deleted:

http://blogologue.com/feedback_self_made_and_produced_demo.p...

[Permalink] [By morphex] [Music (Atom feed)] [07 Feb 16:21 Europe/Oslo]

Failure to communicate and collaborate (seeing more of the kids)

So, I've blogged now and then about my issues seeing the kids, and the kids mom that isn't cooperating.

Two weeks ago today, I sent an email to the kids mom, as well as the family mediation unit where she lives about seeing the kids more often, but neither the kids mom or the unit has replied.

The email I sent the kids mom about seeing the kids more is here:

http://blogologue.com/epost_til_mor.png

The email I sent to the family unit in Mo i Rana (commune) is here:

http://blogologue.com/epost_til_justin.png

I think it's a bad thing that neither the mom nor the family unit are able to communicate when I want to setup something to see the kids more often.

Interestingly, I sent an email to the kids mom on the 19th of January, to which she replied on the 23rd of January:

http://blogologue.com/epost_til_mor_hvordan_ungene_har_det.p...

Telling me a little bit about how the kids are doing. So she is reading email.

[Permalink] [By morphex] [Family (Atom feed)] [02 Feb 17:32 Europe/Oslo]

Getting to see my kids on a regular basis

So, I've gotten to see my kids a couple of times now, and that's nice.

It's good to have a steady and predictable schedule for seeing them, and the supervisor that's there from the state is a good person to have around, as I have issues being alone with the kids mom.

So I get to see my kids 4 hours every six weeks now, and although I enjoy being with the kids and being there for them, every time I get back home it is a bit sad to know that it'll be 6 weeks until I see them again. I don't know how they feel about it after I leave, but I know they want me to be there more often.

I decided a couple of weeks ago to go another round in the court to get full custody of the kids, as I have doubts about how the kids are doing and how they'll turn out when they're older. The previous trial was also a bit poorly prepared from our (me and my lawyer's) side, so I thought it all was a bit unfair and the wrong things were considered and put weight on. And I'm sceptical about the report from the court appointed mental health professionals which concluded that the kids mom had no narcissistic or sociopathic traits (too good to be true for a lot of, if not most, people).

The trial was in June 2015 and the verdict said the first appointment for seeing the kids was the 1. of August, but that fell through, as did the next appointment. I've blogged about that earlier: http://blogologue.com/blog_entry?id=1441623208X02

It's not peaches going another round in court though, as certain things are stacked against me. For example the status quo principle that the situation for the kids should not be changed is important, so even though the sum of the other parts are in my favour, it might go the other way anyway.

I've thought a bit about this, and when the first kid was born I became psychotic, and was under treatment and heavily medicated when me and the kids mom split up in the start of 2013. So I had enough to deal with at that time, and was probably depressed and tired after the psychotic episode as well as the break-up, and wasn't able to muster going to trial. I also couldn't be alone with the kids mom, so seeing them became difficult.

So I guess it's a wait and see thing, to establish a good relationship with the kids again and then go another round in court.

[Permalink] [By morphex] [Family (Atom feed)] [19 Jan 11:09 Europe/Oslo]

Halfway there..

So, I reached a bit of a milestone. Because of mental illness I've had to take some heavy-duty medicine for some time, and at the most I took 800 mg of Seroquel per day.

Today I'm down on 400 mg per day, which is half of that, and I can say I'm quite happy about that. The medicine has short- and long-term side-effects, and on a very long term view, side-effects can also include diabetes and heart disease.

I'm glad that there has been treatment available for my issues, and I can say that today I'm feeling much better than I did 5-10-15-20 years ago.

Here's to many good years to come. 🍷 🍷

[Permalink] [By morphex] [Health (Atom feed)] [14 Sep 08:29 Europe/Oslo]

Dealing with the Norwegian state child-care system, Rana commune and a bad mom

So, I've been struggling to get more time with my kids, and went to trial in June to get something in place.

The judge ordered that I visit the kids every 6th week, with supervision from the commune/state.

Both I and the kids mom wanted supervision, my main motivation for supervision has been, and is, actions that the kids mom has chosen to do, and still chooses to do.

So, long story short, the state department called BUF was supposed to setup supervision for the visits, but so far they have failed to do so. Before the trial I also seldomly got to visit the kids, and then a person from Rana commune was there to supervise.

The trial ended up in a verdict, and the verdict was legally in effect on the 1st of August, but the BUF state department was unable to provide supervision, and is also unable to provide supervision now the 12th of September.

Over a couple of weeks now I've tried to get Rana commune to provide a person that can supervise on the 12th of September, but they are unable to do so. They called me this morning and only wanted to give a verbal message that they could not provide someone. When I pressed on for a written message saying the same, they refused to provide that.

So today I sent the kids mom an email asking if we could be in a public place on Saturday for a couple of hours, but she refused to cooperate on that as well. So the state isn't doing what it should, the commune isn't doing what it could, and the kids mom isn't cooperating. I'd like to add that I emailed the kids mom on the 20th of August regarding getting Rana commune to provide supervision on the 12th of September.

I think that pretty much sums up the situtation, but would like to add that sharing confidential and/or untrue information has many and severe consequences.

[Permalink] [By morphex] [Family (Atom feed)] [07 Sep 12:53 Europe/Oslo]

More on experiencing the Norwegian child-care system

So, I was in a meeting with my lawyer today, and got the explanation that after a verdict with a set number of time with my kids, the mom or rather the primary caretaker can deny anything else.

Which means that the mom of the kids can deny me visiting the kids in the kindergarten and at school, even though that has worked OK in the past.

I think I've blogged enough about this, but would like to add that one of the reasons the trial went as it did, was that the verdict put spoken testimony above an actual document as to whether or not I was cooperating regarding opening a bank account for the smallest kid. I also had to correct my own lawyer in the courtroom regarding this..

A link to a copy of that document is here:

http://blogologue.com/epost_siste_mekling.png

And it clearly shows that I sent an email with a cooperative attitude after the last meditation, but never got any replies to that email and can't see that I've gotten any other emails after that email in that regard either.

[Permalink] [By morphex] [Family (Atom feed)] [18 Aug 21:40 Europe/Oslo]

Experiencing the Norwegian child-care system

So, a couple of months ago I went to trial, partly because I haven't gotten to see a lot of my kids the last couple of years.

Although the trial was a bit of a dissapointment for different reasons, the result seemed to be OK because I got to see my kids every 6th weekend, an improvement from the current situtation and a predictable schedule.

When I visited my kids before the trial, I also visited the kids in the kindergarten and that was an OK experience.

However, it seems that as a result of the trial, the kids mom has come in the position that she can deny me visiting the kids in the kindergarten and at school. Which is strange, because visiting them earlier went OK, and neither the kids mom or her lawyer want to comment further on it.

I have a meeting with my lawyer next week about all of this, so it should be interesting to see what he says about it.

I've heard some talk about mothers having a very strong position in Norway when it comes to who gets care etc. but I'm not sure that's the case, so far things have been very difficult so we'll see what happens next.


[Permalink] [By morphex] [Family (Atom feed)] [13 Aug 07:46 Europe/Oslo]

Developing my XML project in C

So, these last couple of months I've been dabbling with C and XML, to get to know C better. Out of all of this there might also come a nice XML parser and writer that will be freely available for anyone to use.

I wish I learned more C earlier, as a lot of things related to IT have fallen into place now that I've been forced to work on low-level stuff.

There have been quite a number of posts to comp.lang.c, and lots of useful information has been exchanged back and forth.

Anyway, the project is here:

https://github.com/morphex/smash_xml

I guess the bulk of the main code and tests are now around 25KB, which is quite a bit of code. One of the next steps is to create the main parsing loop, which will break down the XML file into its internal C representation. There will also have to be some data types created so that things work well.

One of the more interesting points that have come up is whether to use iteration or recursion when working with the internal representation.

In C, when you do a function call, things are pushed onto something called the stack. And with recursion, more and more things get pushed onto the stack, and if the recursion is deep enough, the stack is exhausted with unpredictable results.

So I think I'm opting for an iterative design in the C code, and using little if any recursion. I'm sure that's going to tick some people off, but having predictable and intelligible results when running the code is important for this project, because one can work with malicious input data.

Right now it feels like I'm past the most "painful" parts of learning C, and look forward to learning and writing more in the time to come.


[Permalink] [By morphex] [C & XML (Atom feed)] [13 Jul 00:51 Europe/Oslo]

C & XML

These last couple of months I've been learning a bit of Assembler and C programming, as these days I have the time available. I've always found Python and other high-level languages fast enough for what I needed to do, but I've always wondered a bit about C and Assembler.

What I've learned so far is that the computer is in fact a very large calculator, and pretty much everything that happens is that instructions are called (for example adding two numbers), and that numbers are moved around in memory, disk, peripherals etc. I've found it useful to learn about Assembler and C because it gives me a more detailed and correct view of how things work in computing.

With my programming and system administration background, I found it easy to dive into C and Assembler, and I also appreciate a lot more what for example Python does as a high-level programming language.

I've been looking for some gig or project to create a C and Assembler project for, and what I've landed on so far is that I want to create an XML parser. An XML parser that validates the Unicode used, as well as insures that the document is "well formed". I haven't gotten that far yet, but I've pretty much decided that the parser should (for now at least) be restricted to an UTF-32-LE encoding, and that whenever I work with pointers the rule is to initialize to null when they are created as well as after free() has been called.

I think this is good fun and I do it whenever I have the time and energy, here's the code so far:

#include <stdlib.h>
#include <stdio.h>

int main() {
  char *buffer = NULL;
  int read = 0;
  buffer = malloc(1024*sizeof(char));
  FILE *file = NULL;
  file = fopen("test.xml.2", "rb+");
  read = fread(buffer, sizeof(char), 1024, file);
  if ((char)buffer[0] == (char)0xFF && (char)buffer[1] == (char)0xFE &&
      (char)buffer[2] == (char)0x00 && (char)buffer[3] == (char)0x00) {
    // We have a UTF-32-LE Byte Order Mark                                       
    printf("BOM found\n");
  } else {
    printf("BOM not found, %x\n", buffer[0]);
    exit(1);
  }
  printf("%i\n", read);
  fwrite(buffer, read, 1, stdout);
  printf("\n");
  free(buffer); buffer = NULL;
  return 0;
}


[Permalink] [By morphex] [Technology (Atom feed)] [09 May 11:44 Europe/Oslo]